Volume 1, Chapter 38: Midnight Banquet

Under the pretext of going to the restroom, the Taoist priest called me outside. "You little rascal," he said, "go in there in a moment and ask that young woman two things for me. First, does she have a boyfriend? Second, has she ever slept with a man?"

I asked in astonishment, "How am I supposed to ask something like that?"

"If you don't ask, I'm even less in a position to. It would be unbecoming of my age."

I scoffed, "She's a kindergarten teacher and thinks of me as a kid. How am I supposed to ask her? Should I say, 'Teacher, have you ever slept with a grown man?'"

"Cut the crap, you need to ask. It's very important."

"Her father is still right there, how can I ask?"

Indeed, it was impossible to bring up. Besides, with her parents present, the girl might not tell the truth anyway.

For example, suppose a young girl has irregular menstruation, and her parents take her to see a gynecologist. The doctor is bound to ask if she is sexually active. What does the girl say?

The standard answer is always no.

Yet this also has a drawback. If she says no, the doctor might not order tests for early pregnancy and just prescribe medication directly, which could potentially result in a double fatality.

After all, in real life, there are no immaculate conceptions like the Virgin Mary. Any married woman in the countryside who gets pregnant while her husband is away is simply committing adultery.

The Taoist priest gave me a kick, then called the big man out and had him show him around the front and back of the house.

Filled with a hundred and eighty degrees of reluctance, I took small, staggering steps toward the girl's room.

The girl looked at me and smiled, "What's your name?"

Her voice was full of magnetic warmth.

I scratched my head and said, "Xu Duo."

"A good name, Xu Duo, really pleasant to hear. What grade are you in?"

I blushed and said sheepishly, "Well, um, I'm an orphan. I've never been to school."

"Oh, what a hard life."

The girl's look toward me turned pitiful, her smile transforming into a maternal one. "It doesn't matter if you haven't been to school. You're growing up to be a real man, and making a living on your own won't be a problem. My dad never went to school either, didn't know many characters, but by working steadily and honestly, life turned out just fine."

I nodded.

The girl said a lot of comforting words. Given the time and place, it made it even more impossible for me to blurt out those brazen questions.

Before long, the Taoist priest returned. I shook my head at him.

He kicked me again, grabbed the big man, and went back outside.

The girl looked a bit bewildered and asked, "What's wrong? Was he not nice to you?"

"He was nice."

"Then why did he kick you for no reason?"

"He told me to ask you a question, but I didn't ask."

Curious, the girl asked, "What did he want to ask?"

"Have you ever slept with a man?"

I kept my head down, catching from the corner of my eye that her face had instantly turned as red as the hot-water-drinking cat in *Tom and Jerry*.

"Y-y-you, why are you asking that?"

"I didn't ask it, my master did. To cure your illness, he has to find out clearly first."

"I've kissed someone."

"T-then do you have a boyfriend now?"

"No. When I was in school, we only held hands and kissed."

Without answering further, I turned around and went to tell the Taoist priest.

His expression turned gloomy.

When the woman came back, the Taoist priest said coldly, "The situation is quite tricky now. I asked the wild ghosts, and they said the girl is already married. If we can't find the cause, she might never be able to marry in her lifetime."

"Ah? T-then what should we do?"

The woman panicked.

The Taoist priest said slowly, "I mentioned leaving three thousand yuan, meaning you should symbolically hold a wedding banquet—hold it at night, simulating the scene of a daughter getting married. Hold this ceremony once, and it will protect the girl from harm for three years."

The man asked, "Master Ma, what is actually going on here?"

"To be honest with you, even I haven't fully figured it out. My method can save the child's life, but wanting her to marry a living man will be difficult."

The Taoist priest continued, "The girl has been matched in a ghost marriage; in the netherworld, they are already a lawful couple. I just can't understand how someone who is alive and well could have their soul extracted to enter a nether-marriage."

The woman burst into tears.

The man cursed, "Fine then! Isn't this already good enough? It just means she doesn't marry, that's all. I'll farm corn and provide for her for the rest of my life."

With that, the man turned and smiled ingratiatingly at the Taoist priest. "Master Ma, this is already good enough. As long as she can stay alive, never mind not getting married—even if she were paralyzed in bed, I could support her for a lifetime."

"Alas, this is my only way to drag out the child's life. Otherwise, you can go inquire elsewhere to see if there are any other masters."

"We won't look any further. We'll do just this. Whatever you say, we'll do."

The Taoist priest swallowed hard and said, "Tonight, set up six banquet tables in the courtyard. Five normal tables, and one table consisting entirely of raw meat—pork blood, pork liver, chicken, and duck are a must, along with a pig's head."

"Understood."

"Serve the dishes after dark, and then you don't need to worry about anything else. Clear everything up early tomorrow morning. Throw away the bowls and chopsticks, and burn the tables and chairs."

"No problem."

The man agreed readily, shouted out, and went to find the folks in the village to help.

That was the good thing about rural life in Northeast China: when one family had an issue, the entire village came to help.

In those days, a banquet costing a hundred yuan a table was considered quite a decent spread.

Tables and benches that no one in the village wanted were hauled over to the host's house, and six sets of seating were quickly gathered together.

At sunset, the villagers bustled about preparing to serve the dishes while inside the house the girl bathed and changed clothes, looking just like an imperial concubine preparing to attend the emperor.

The Taoist priest furrowed his brow with worry. I comforted him, "Master, there are always masters above masters, and mortals don't know everything."

"How can a living person be matched in a ghost marriage? I just can't wrap my head around it."

"If you can't figure it out, don't think about it. As long as her life is saved, holding a banquet once every three years costs less than three thousand yuan—less than a thousand a year. What a bargain."

The Taoist priest let out a long sigh and said earnestly, "Xu Duo, you must study hard and read more books."

"Mm," I nodded earnestly.

At sunset, the food and wine were fully served. The villagers tacitly kept their doors shut and stayed inside. The girl lay naked under the covers, and the double-happiness character pasted on the bedroom door pierced the Taoist priest's heart.

The Taoist priest sat alone in the courtyard, raising his cup to toast the empty air. He drank like this all through the night.

I wanted to help, but there was nothing I could do. Whenever I poured wine for the Taoist priest, my hand would tremble, filling his cup only a little bit each time.

The surroundings were freezing—a chill far more biting than a snowy day. The host's big yellow dog curled up in its kennel, shivering and baring its teeth.

The drunken Taoist priest hunched his shoulders, struggling to drink as if wholeheartedly keeping company with the lonely wandering ghosts.

Looking at his posture, that was the first time I felt my heart ache for my master.

That night, the village was dead quiet. Every household turned off their lights early. No birds chirped, no beasts howled, and only gusts of gloomy wind swept through the surroundings.

Grandpa Sun Si smacked his lips twice and said, "Don't look at how few households are left in the village now. Back in the sixties, there were tons of people here. During the Up to the Mountains and Down to the Villages movement, we were the largest youth settlement for ten miles around; there were seventy or eighty educated youths alone."