Chapter Two: Senior, You Mustn’t Take Off Any More!

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Sole Me Sect.

On a tree-lined path.

Hearing the voice in his mind, Wang Ran was utterly dumbfounded!

Damn it!

Could this be the legendary... golden finger?

Then, overjoyed, Wang Ran threw his head back and laughed.

“Hahahaha, finally you’ve arrived—good thing I didn’t give up!”

His eerie laughter echoed throughout the forested mountains.

Across from him, a few black-clad assassins exchanged glances, each seeing confusion in the others’ eyes.

“What is he doing?”

“No idea, but I fear an ambush!”

“Agreed. Let’s observe first!”

“We mustn’t act rashly!”

...

Meanwhile.

A virtual system interface emerged in Wang Ran’s mind, and the first thing he did was demand, “Why did you take so long to appear?”

As a transmigrator, he had indeed been granted a boon, but wasn’t this boon coming a bit too late? If it hadn’t shown up today, he’d be dead meat, and if he died, wouldn’t the billion girls who secretly adored him be heartbroken?

Thus, Wang Ran scolded harshly, “Do you have any idea how much you’ve delayed me? I’m telling you, you’re fully responsible for this. If you don’t compensate me with a million or so top-tier Daoist techniques, I’ll never let you off!”

System: “...”

Wang Ran pressed urgently, “Say something!”

“Ding-dong, this system does not accept false claims.”

“Ding-dong, detecting the host’s infuriating character, it is strongly recommended you activate the Shameless Mode!”

Wang Ran froze.

Shameless Mode?

What the hell is that?

He heard the system’s introduction: “In this mode, as long as the host acts shamelessly and without bottom line, you will earn Dao Value.”

At this, Wang Ran was not pleased.

“Who’s shameless? Who has no bottom line? I was one of my city’s top ten outstanding youths!”

“...”

Though the system said nothing, Wang Ran could still feel its overwhelming disdain.

“Enough, stop the nonsense. Tell me how this system actually works.”

“Ding-dong, all functions of this system require Dao Value to operate.”

Dao Value?

Wang Ran frowned and focused his thoughts on the virtual screen.

Sure enough, several areas were sectioned off.

Lottery, Store, Backpack, and so on.

He looked at the first option.

Lottery: Consumes one Dao Value per use, and draws a random reward.

(Note: Consuming ten Dao Value allows you to activate the Daoist Technique Lottery and draw a random technique.)

Store: Contains any item from the myriad worlds—if you can imagine it, we can provide it, so long as you have enough Dao Value!

For now, only these two sections were accessible; as for the backpack, it was completely empty.

“Ding-dong, the host currently possesses one Dao Value. Would you like to draw a lottery?”

Is that even a question?

Of course he would!

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Wang Ran nodded immediately and confirmed his choice.

Before his eyes, the compass on the lottery function began spinning rapidly. In no time, a flash of light appeared, and a perfectly round, green object materialized out of thin air.

“Ding-dong, congratulations, Host, you have drawn an Enhanced Grenade!”

What... what kind of egg?

Grenade?

What the hell!

What kind of nonsense is this! Why would a grenade appear in a world of immortals and martial arts?

Wang Ran felt a wave of frustration.

He lowered his head and carefully examined the round object in his hand; the top even had a pull ring. It was, unmistakably, a grenade.

There was even a special marking for "Enhanced Version" on it.

But was it really okay for a grenade to appear in a xianxia world?

While Wang Ran was lost in thought, the two black-clad assassins opposite him saw him staring blankly at the item. Their eyes flashed with menace.

“This kid really doesn’t take us seriously!”

“Hmph, must be a fool!”

“Exactly. Let’s kill him and collect our reward!”

After a quick glance at one another, the two drew their longswords and charged straight at Wang Ran.

Hearing the approaching footsteps, Wang Ran had no time to think further. Desperate, he pulled the pin and hurled the grenade.

With a swish, a green flash streaked across, and the grenade was actually caught barehanded by one of the assassins.

He glanced down, sneered, and said, “A petty trick. Do you really think such a tiny hidden weapon could harm me?”

Not far away, Wang Ran was startled by this move. “Hey, you can’t catch that thing with your hands...”

The black-clad man laughed wildly. “So what if I did?”

“Fine, catch it if you want, but you absolutely mustn’t squeeze it...”

“What a joke! You say I can’t squeeze it, so I won’t? I’ll do just that!” With a colder sneer, the assassin really did give it a hard squeeze.

Wang Ran watched in terror and quickly retreated several meters.

The black-clad man scoffed, “Coward! So what if I squeeze this thing? Will it explode? See, nothing at all—”

Before he could finish, a thunderous boom erupted. In an instant, flames shot skyward!

The entire bamboo forest was swept by a violent blast. The assassin’s position bore the brunt; black smoke billowed and the air was thick with haze.

“Cough, cough.”

After a long while, Wang Ran coughed as he peered toward the spot.

On the ground was a large, cracked pit. The black-clad assassin who’d been standing there had vanished without a trace; only a few tattered scraps of cloth drifted down.

In the center of the pit was a pile of black ash.

Wang Ran’s mouth twitched. Good grief, he’d been blasted to dust!

That had been a Foundation Establishment cultivator, and even he couldn’t withstand a single blow from this grenade!

Meanwhile, the other assassin was stupefied. Having been farther away, he’d luckily survived, though badly wounded and in rags.

He wiped the black soot from his face and looked at Wang Ran in horror, trembling as he shouted, “What... what did you do to my brother?”

Now Wang Ran felt emboldened. He puffed up his chest and shouted, “What, you want to try my Super Invincible Thunderbolt Grenade for yourself?”

Super Invincible Thunderbolt Grenade?

Just the name was terrifying!

Looking at the devastating power of that mysterious weapon and the gaping pit, the remaining assassin quickly assessed his own strength—then immediately caved.

He threw up his hands in a desperate salute, his face full of misery. “Senior, it was all a misunderstanding!”

Wang Ran was momentarily taken aback by this, then grew a bit embarrassed. He pointed to the pile of ash and hesitated, “So about your brother’s death...”

“He deserved it!” the assassin suddenly shouted with unbridled fury. “That despicable man dared to ambush a senior—serves him right! He died perfectly! Senior, you’re a genius of Sole Me Sect not seen in ten thousand years, righteous and generous, loyalty towering to the heavens. For him to attack you was unforgivable! Thank you for cleansing my family’s name...”

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This assassin was quite a talent. He cursed his brother’s ancestors back eighteen generations, growing more impassioned and indignant with every word.

Wang Ran cleared his throat, a bit abashed, and interrupted, “Ahem, perhaps you should stop cursing for now and compensate me for my emotional distress instead.”

“Uh? Emotional distress compensation?” The assassin was dumbstruck.

Wang Ran replied earnestly, “Yes, but I’m a very righteous man, so don’t worry about me extorting you. Just give me ten thousand spirit jades as a token.”

Spirit jades were gemstones infused with spiritual energy, commonly used as currency in this world of immortals.

The assassin’s face turned unspeakably awkward. Stammering, he said, “Senior, I... I truly don’t have that many spirit jades. I only have twenty on me; perhaps you could...”

“No need to say more!” Wang Ran abruptly raised a hand to cut him off. “I understand your situation. Rest assured, I am generous and righteous. Today, I’ll make an exception and give you a twenty percent discount. I’ll take your twenty spirit jades for now, and you can slowly pay off the remaining seven thousand or so over the rest of your life.”

“Se... Senior, you’re truly a paragon of virtue, a model for us all!”

Hearing Wang Ran’s words, the assassin’s heart bled, but he forced out a smile uglier than a cry and tremblingly handed over the twenty spirit jades.

Wang Ran accepted them without blinking, then his gaze sharpened. “Hmm? What’s that on your neck?”

“Se... Senior, it’s just a family heirloom jade pendant.”

“Oh really? Looks quite nice. I was just thinking of buying a necklace at the market someday—yours suits you well.” Wang Ran patted his shoulder warmly.

The assassin shuddered in terror and hurriedly took off the pendant. “Such a precious item is wasted on someone like me. Meeting you, Senior, is fate! Please accept it!”

“Oh, that seems improper.” Wang Ran took the necklace, feigning modesty.

“It’s proper, very proper.”

“Well, fine. I’ll keep it safe for you. Oh—your sword is quite good, too...”

“It’s yours, Senior!” Without hesitation, the assassin presented his grade-two spirit blade with both hands.

“See, I was just complimenting you—no need to give it to me. Oh, and what’s this?”

“That’s yours too, Senior!”

“By the way, where did you get those shoes?”

“Senior, I’ll take them off right now!”

...

A quarter of an hour later.

The assassin stood in the cold wind, shivering in nothing but a pair of white underpants, tears and snot streaming down his face. “Senior, I truly can’t take off anything else—there’s nothing left!”

Wang Ran smiled. “Relax, relax, I wouldn’t take that even if you gave it to me for free.”

The assassin wanted to cry but had no tears, bowing in apology. “Thank you, Senior, you are truly a great and righteous man!”

Wang Ran replied humbly, “Ah, keep it low-key—it’s just my duty.”

“Senior, I’ll be taking my leave now.”

Without waiting for Wang Ran’s reply, the assassin turned and fled as fast as he could.

Suddenly remembering something, Wang Ran shouted, “Wait, who sent you?”

But the assassin didn’t answer, sprinting away at breakneck speed, terrified of being fleeced any further.

At last, all Wang Ran could see was a faint red rooster tattoo on the man’s swinging arm.

“Ding-dong, congratulations to Host Wang Ran for a successful act of shamelessness—awarded one Dao Value!”

“Ding-dong, congratulations to Host Wang Ran for successful extortion—awarded two Dao Value!”

“Ding-dong, congratulations to Host Wang Ran for earning the ‘Plucking Feathers from an Iron Rooster’ title—awarded two Dao Value!”

After hearing the string of notifications in his mind, Wang Ran’s expression remained unchanged. He leapt up and stood atop a bamboo tip, hands behind his back.

“A master’s loneliness—at my mere snap, black-clad assassins turn to dust...”

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